Monday, September 14, 2009
St. Peter And The Man Knocking On Heaven's Door
There is a knock on St. Peter's door. He looks out and a man
is standing there. St. Peter is about to begin his interview when
the man disappears.
A short time later there's another knock. St. Peter gets the door,
sees the man, opens his mouth to speak, and the man disappears
once again.
A few minutes later, another knock. Once again St. Peter opens
the door and sees the same man.
"Hey, are you playing games with me?" St. Peter calls after him.
"No," the man's distant voice replies anxiously. "They're trying
to resuscitate me."
is standing there. St. Peter is about to begin his interview when
the man disappears.
A short time later there's another knock. St. Peter gets the door,
sees the man, opens his mouth to speak, and the man disappears
once again.
A few minutes later, another knock. Once again St. Peter opens
the door and sees the same man.
"Hey, are you playing games with me?" St. Peter calls after him.
"No," the man's distant voice replies anxiously. "They're trying
to resuscitate me."
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
Is Sarah Palin Moonlighting At Fox News As A Geographer?
A poster on Twitter Pics, stefanoscalia, took this screenshot from a Fox News broadcast on July 27, 2009 and posted it immediately to Twitter @ 1:01 PM.
Perhaps Sarah Palin is the new Geographer-in-Chief at Fox?
Perhaps Sarah Palin is the new Geographer-in-Chief at Fox?
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Monday, July 27, 2009
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Colbert Remembering Remembering Michael Jackson
| The Colbert Report | Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c | |||
| ||||
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
19 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity
1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and Point A Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don’t Disguise Your Voice.
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries with that.
4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It “In.”
5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone Has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch To Espresso.
6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write “For Sexual Favors”
7. Finish All Your Sentences With “In Accordance With The Prophecy.”
8. Don’t Use Any Punctuation
9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.
10. Ask People What Sex They Are. Laugh Hysterically After They Answer.
11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is “To Go.”
12. Sing Along At The Opera.
13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don’t Rhyme
14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play Tropical Sounds All Day.
15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can’t Attend Their Party because You’re Not In The Mood.
16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Hard.
17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream “I Won! I Won!”
18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking Lot, Yelling“Run For Your Lives, They’re Loose!!”
19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner. “Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.”
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don’t Disguise Your Voice.
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They Want Fries with that.
4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It “In.”
5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone Has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch To Espresso.
6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write “For Sexual Favors”
7. Finish All Your Sentences With “In Accordance With The Prophecy.”
8. Don’t Use Any Punctuation
9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.
10. Ask People What Sex They Are. Laugh Hysterically After They Answer.
11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is “To Go.”
12. Sing Along At The Opera.
13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don’t Rhyme
14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play Tropical Sounds All Day.
15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can’t Attend Their Party because You’re Not In The Mood.
16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Hard.
17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream “I Won! I Won!”
18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking Lot, Yelling“Run For Your Lives, They’re Loose!!”
19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner. “Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go.”
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