Wednesday, April 8, 2009
Tuesday, April 7, 2009
Things A Southerner Would Never Say Or Think
She's too young to be wearing a bikini.
Does the salad bar have bean sprouts?
Hey, here's an episode of "Hee Haw" that we haven't seen.
I don't have a favorite college or NFL team.
Be sure to bring my salad dressing on the side.
Those shorts ought to be a little longer, Darla.
Nope, no more for me. I'm driving tonight.
I'll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex.
Duct tape won't fix that.
Honey, I think we should sell the pickup and buy a family sedan.
We don't keep firearms in this house.
Has anybody seen the sideburns trimmer?
You can't feed that chicken to the dog.
I thought Graceland was tacky.
Cappuccino tastes better than espresso.
The tires on that truck are too big.
I've got it all on the C drive.
Unsweetened tea tastes better.
Would you like your fish poached or broiled?
My fiance, Bobbie Jo, is registered at Tiffany's.
Little Debbie snack cakes have too many fat grams.
Checkmate.
No kids in the back of the pickup, it's just not safe.
Wrestling's fake.
Honey, did you mail that donation to Greenpeace?
We're vegetarians.
Do you think my gut is too big?
I'll have grapefruit and grapes instead of biscuits and gravy.
Honey, we don't need another dog.
Who gives a crap who won the Civil War?
Give me the small bag of pork rinds.
Too many deer heads detract from the decor.
Spitting is such a nasty habit.
I just couldn't find a thing at Walmart today.
Trim the fat off that steak.
You All.
Does the salad bar have bean sprouts?
Hey, here's an episode of "Hee Haw" that we haven't seen.
I don't have a favorite college or NFL team.
Be sure to bring my salad dressing on the side.
Those shorts ought to be a little longer, Darla.
Nope, no more for me. I'm driving tonight.
I'll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex.
Duct tape won't fix that.
Honey, I think we should sell the pickup and buy a family sedan.
We don't keep firearms in this house.
Has anybody seen the sideburns trimmer?
You can't feed that chicken to the dog.
I thought Graceland was tacky.
Cappuccino tastes better than espresso.
The tires on that truck are too big.
I've got it all on the C drive.
Unsweetened tea tastes better.
Would you like your fish poached or broiled?
My fiance, Bobbie Jo, is registered at Tiffany's.
Little Debbie snack cakes have too many fat grams.
Checkmate.
No kids in the back of the pickup, it's just not safe.
Wrestling's fake.
Honey, did you mail that donation to Greenpeace?
We're vegetarians.
Do you think my gut is too big?
I'll have grapefruit and grapes instead of biscuits and gravy.
Honey, we don't need another dog.
Who gives a crap who won the Civil War?
Give me the small bag of pork rinds.
Too many deer heads detract from the decor.
Spitting is such a nasty habit.
I just couldn't find a thing at Walmart today.
Trim the fat off that steak.
You All.
Monday, April 6, 2009
Antwerp's Central Train Station Serves As Biggest Musical Stage Ever
How cool is this? The people behind this, the people who witnessed it, created an artistic experience which no one will ever forget . . . Be sure to click on the HD selector:
Sunday, April 5, 2009
There's No Satisfying A Woman
A group of girlfriends are on vacation when they see a 5-story
hotel with a sign that reads: "For Women Only". Since they are
without their boyfriends and husbands, they decide to go in.
The Bouncer, a very attractive guy, explains to them how it
works.
"We have 5 floors. Go up floor by floor, and once you find what
you are looking for, you can stay there. It's easy to decide
since each floor has a sign telling you what's inside."
So they start going up and on the first floor the sign reads:
"All the men here have it short and thin." The friends laugh
and without hesitation move on to the next floor.
The sign on the second floor reads: "All the men here have it
long and thin." Still, this isn't good enough so the friends
continue on up.
They reach the third floor and the sign reads: "All the men
here have it short and thick."
They still want to do better, and so, knowing there are still
two floors left, they continued on up.
On the fourth floor, the sign is perfect: "All the men here
have it long and thick." The women get all excited and are
going in when they realize that there is still one floor left.
Wondering what they are missing, they head on up to the fifth
floor.
There they find a sign that reads: "There are no men here.
This floor was built only to prove that there is no way to
please a woman."
hotel with a sign that reads: "For Women Only". Since they are
without their boyfriends and husbands, they decide to go in.
The Bouncer, a very attractive guy, explains to them how it
works.
"We have 5 floors. Go up floor by floor, and once you find what
you are looking for, you can stay there. It's easy to decide
since each floor has a sign telling you what's inside."
So they start going up and on the first floor the sign reads:
"All the men here have it short and thin." The friends laugh
and without hesitation move on to the next floor.
The sign on the second floor reads: "All the men here have it
long and thin." Still, this isn't good enough so the friends
continue on up.
They reach the third floor and the sign reads: "All the men
here have it short and thick."
They still want to do better, and so, knowing there are still
two floors left, they continued on up.
On the fourth floor, the sign is perfect: "All the men here
have it long and thick." The women get all excited and are
going in when they realize that there is still one floor left.
Wondering what they are missing, they head on up to the fifth
floor.
There they find a sign that reads: "There are no men here.
This floor was built only to prove that there is no way to
please a woman."
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