Human beat boxes, beware. This trained choir outdoes you all . . .
Thursday, November 12, 2009
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
20 One Liners - Part 1
1.I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
2 Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
3 I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
4 Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. "Yes" is the answer.
5 The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list.
6 Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship.
7 We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police.
8 Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
9 If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong.
10 Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.
11 We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.
12 Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.
13 War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
14 Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
15 Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
16 Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason.
17 Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up.
18 The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
19 My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.
20 Evening news is where they begin with 'Good evening', and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.
2 Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.
3 I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
4 Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. "Yes" is the answer.
5 The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it's still on the list.
6 Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship.
7 We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police.
8 Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
9 If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong.
10 Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.
11 We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.
12 Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand.
13 War does not determine who is right - only who is left.
14 Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
15 Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
16 Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason.
17 Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up.
18 The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
19 My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.
20 Evening news is where they begin with 'Good evening', and then proceed to tell you why it isn't.
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Russian Forklift Driver Wipes Out Entire Aisle Of Liquor Worth $150,000
Here's what a chain reaction collapse of shelving looks like in a liquor warehouse.
Bad Roomate, Bad Brother, or Bad Dad . . . whatever . . . bad, bad, bad!
A perplexed Doberman Pinscher whose ears have been clipped is probably still working off some heavy drugs. Add in an evil roomate/brother/dad who owns a laser pointer which the dog is fixated on, and the next thing you know, ole Fido is biting down on a nutsack sandwich. I grimace and laugh every time I see this:
Monday, November 9, 2009
Sunday, November 8, 2009
The Amazing Human Jumbotron
Just the thought of coordinating this many humans to act and react in such split second fashion boggles the mind:
Saturday, November 7, 2009
Boston Celtic Jumbotron Takeover By One Exuberant Bon Jovi Fan
Here's another exuberant music fan, singing and dancing without a care in the world. Look at the smiles, laughter, high-fives and hugs he gets from other Boston Celtic fans who share Jumbotron face time with him:
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